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21 May 2012 @ 04:17 pm
Being forgotten is SAD, okay?! Okay...  
Title: Delimit
Pairing(s)/Characters: KyuHae, Kyuhyun/?
Rating: PG-13
Genre: angst, friendship, romance
Disclaimer: Owns the fic, nothing else.
Summary: Donghae knows everything about Kyuhyun. He proves it to himself by becoming the narrator of his dongsaeng's secret life ever since he fell asleep in the backseat of Kyuhyun's car, once upon a time. But one night, Donghae desperately fails.









“Good evening.”

“Good evening.”

You let her sit at the passenger’s seat beside you. That seat’s only open for her, I noticed. You like her sitting beside you. Actually, you like her staying by your side whenever because you’re aware that your time together is too limited. See? It’s too limited that you only get to see her during the wee hours of the night. You’re sweet for picking her up at this café. Don’t you remember? You told her earlier that you’d meet her there. You did but don’t you know that you promised to meet her at 12 for lunch? Around this time, people wouldn’t even be eating dinner anymore. It’s already 11 and you should be thankful that that café is open until two hours past twelve. What were you thinking?

“I’m sorry. I guess—“

“It’s okay. I understand. I always do.”

You blush and she giggles at how red your cheeks are. You think her laugh is cute. So cute that you can’t help but smile and blush harder. She’s smiling now.

“How was your day?”

She fixes her bangs a little and looks at her side to look at you.

“Mm… I’m sure it wasn’t as busy as yours but it was okay.”

You bite your lip. You transform into this nervous mess whenever you’re with her. You’re never like this with us or in variety shows or anywhere else. She’s the only person capable enough to take your cool away and replace it with timidity. It’s amazing isn’t it? I can’t even do that.

“Oppa?”

You smile whenever you hear her call you that. It sounds nice. To hear her voice and calling you oppa in that special, cute way of hers - you think it’s really special don’t you? That warm smile playing on your lips kinda makes it obvious. You don’t even respond to anything close to this when I call you or when the others do. You seem out of it every time.

“Oppa~”

You chuckle. She does this often right? When she feels that you’re feeling a little too uneasy or when you’re silent and serious, she tries and makes you laugh. She always does a great job because you do laugh whenever she tries.

“Thank you for today.”

“Hmm? What for?”

“For making me laugh.”

And she laughs too. You thank her all the time for all these simple attempts just to see you smile. She’s cute isn’t she? She is. She’s like a child. Maybe that’s why you can’t help but feel protective of her. It’s because she’s so much like a child that you want to shower her with your care and warmth. But as much as you want to do these things, you rarely ever do.

“Were you lonely?”

“A little. But I’m getting used to it from time to time.”

When she says this, it scares you doesn’t it? I guess it does because whenever she mentions this, that she’ll get used to it – to being lonely someday, you think that she might not need you anymore. That she might learn to be more independent. And you know how much you want to take care of her. When that happens, she wouldn’t be that child anymore and when you get the chance to shower her with your concern and warmth by that time, she might not need it any longer. It’d be too late by then.

“I hope I can adjust faster so that oppa wouldn’t worry that much. I don’t want to be a bother.”

She’s so selfless isn’t she? It’s good that she is but deep inside, I think you wish she could’ve been a little selfish instead. That way, you get to take care of her more. But it ends there, somehow. You think of taking care of her, you want to take care of her even so, you just can’t. Not when you’re an idol who needs to improve himself everyday for the masses.

“You’re not a bother. You can never be.”

“Mmm…”

She hums whenever you tell her that. You know she doesn’t believe you. She’s a child that way. Then she starts talking about her family. How her older sisters bully her when they visit after work and how her parents are so busy that she begins to eat ramen at a near-by convenience store for dinner. She doesn’t know how to cook much and you can relate with her in that department. Aside from that though, you wish you could talk like that with her too. About simple everyday life. You already told her about your pre-debut days so there’s not much to talk about. You don’t want to talk about how it is when you go to variety shows or when you go up stage and sing to thousands of people because you know, she wouldn’t be able to get the feeling. She doesn’t go to variety shows or sing to thousands of people. She goes to a university and studies really hard but still finds time to talk to you when usually, during phone calls, you only stay for twenty minutes at maximum. Like I said, your time together is too limited. At least you could still take her on night drives around the city. You’re really thankful for that right? Of course you are.

“Oppa?”

“Hmm?”

“Why don’t you ever talk about your day? It’s unfair.”

She looks at you again and smiles. I bet you could see her through peripheral vision even when you’re watching the road extend thousands of miles away more. She says it’s unfair but I know that you’re thinking of the opposite. You think it’s only fair not to talk about your day. You don’t want to tell her how tiring your day was because she already knows. Then again, does she know all your schedules? Does she know what shows you appear on every day? Does she know the stuff that you talk about with us? With the group? Does she know how Sungmin hyung and you argue all the time even over the simplest of things? Does she even know what you did before picking her up moments ago? Does she?

“Oppa?”

“I’m sorry. I’m a little…”

“Oh. It’s okay. I know how you feel. Exams are fast-approaching as well. I’ll be as busy as you by then.”

At times like these, you think you’re insensitive. She makes the time to talk to you on the phone even for twenty minutes or less and when you actually get the chance to be with her, to talk to her and make up for the forty minutes lacking in your phone calls because you want to listen to her voice all day long, you clam up and listen to her instead. She tries and makes you laugh and you don’t forget to thank her for that but is that all you can do? You finally get the chance to be with her and what do you do? You’re such a hypocrite.

“Sing for me.”

“You can turn on the radio instead, oppa. Way better.”

“Please?”

“Ehh…”

“For me? Please?”

With her, I see you begging all the time. Way back at the dorms? You never do. Her effect on you is incredible. I can’t even compare to that. No one can. You feel lucky to have met her. You tell me all the time remember? Every day, you tell me she’s one of the best things that ever happened to you.

“Okay. Fine.”

“Yey~”

You’re a dork. When you’re with her though? You’re ten times the dork than you already are. You get her to sing for you almost every time. Her singing isn’t as good as our fellow singers but you like it. You like how she sings so freely and effortlessly. You like that when she sings, it reminds you of your childhood – carefree and relaxing. That’s what you feel with her too. Or at least, that’s what you tell me.

Her singing is nice. So soft and… Smooth… Like a never-ending lullaby… It’s nice…

“Oppa, can I tell you something?”

“Okay. What is it?”

~*~*~*~*~*~

It’s silent. That’s odd. Usually, when you get her to sing, I fall asleep and when I wake up, you two would be talking non-stop about random things like bushes or stars. You’re a dork that way and she’s a child that way. Makes perfect sense but this silence doesn’t fit at all.

“Oppa.”

“Yeah?”

“Do you remember the first time you held my hand?”

“It was raining that time wasn’t it?”

You told me that story before. It was raining and you saw her under a tree. She was only standing there, waiting for the rain to stop pouring. You said that was the third time you saw her in campus. You also said you had a few conversations by that time so you didn’t hesitate to walk over and offer to share your umbrella with her. She was soaked that time, of course and it was cold. You saw her rubbing her hands together for warmth then you grabbed her hand and held it tight. That’s how it went right?

“Yeah. Oh. Our first date?”

“We went to my house and watched movies.”

“Mmm… The second?”

“We went to your house and watched movies.”

“That was really fun!”

I don’t get it. Why the random flashbacks? Shouldn’t you be talking about the stars or the moon? How many hours have you been driving around the streets? The silence is here again. You two never let silence rule over your random conversations. But why tonight?

“Let’s go home.”

“Okay.”

You usually ask for another round around the streets. Odd. This is the first time that you didn’t ask for one. She looks out the window and you focus yourself with driving. The silence is weird.

The car stops and you’re parked outside her house. She unbuckles her seatbelt and you do the same. She turns to you and you look at her. There’s a long pause. That’s new too. Then you tug at her hand and hug her. She hugs you back with her arms around your neck. The hug tonight seems weird too. She pulls away but I feel as if you don’t want to let go yet, which is unlikely again. Your hugs seem quick usually. You both stare at each other for one last time before she goes home.

“Good night, Kyu oppa.”

You don’t say a thing. Wait. Okay that’s really weird. Why aren’t you saying anything? Kyu, what’s wrong? The car door just closed. The bang sort’ve echoed in the car. You’re staring at the empty passenger’s seat with that sad look. You’re supposed to be telling me stories now. You’re supposed to be a fanboy now and spazz all the way home.

“Hae.”

Why does that tone in your voice sound so familiar? You should be fishing your phone from your pocket and send her a goodnight text. Why aren’t you moving? And why… Oh forget it.

“How can you let go of her just like that?”

You’re chuckling, low and sad. You push yourself back into your seat.

“You know I love her.”

“Of course but why—“

You nod. Once, twice, thrice. I sit up and see you looking out the window like how she did earlier. This night is weird. And somehow, from the first moment I accidentally fell asleep in the back seat of your car to tonight, I think I know what just happened.

“I have a lot to say to you, Kyu.”

“Yeah.”

“But for now, let me just say you’re an idiot. I’ll tell you everything else later.”

You can’t possibly let me get away with calling you an idiot right? You’re our maknae. Our evil maknae. You’re going to sit up straight and glare at me through the rear-view mirror any minute now. Then you’re going to threaten me and tell people made-up stories and…

“Yeah. Let’s go home then.”

You didn’t. You let me watch you for the past few weeks and I thought I got everything down in notes. I guess I’m not cut-out to be psychic. Or better yet, I’m not cut-out to be your best friend.


Oppa, I’m sorry.




A/N: Forgive this crappy writer for writing her very first KyuHae to be quite.. Angsty? Sigh. I'm sorry for the fail, y'all. Comments are very much appreciated. Be it good or bad, anything's welcome.




 
 
Current Location: Kyuhyun's room
Current Mood: pissed offpissed off
Current Music: Sexy Love - Jonghyun and Jessica
 
 
kyuwifeykyuwifey on May 21st, 2012 09:14 am (UTC)
well keep writing kyuhae fics ^^
this kinda short need moreeeeee
Carol: Donghae wuvv~k19a2i8m1 on May 21st, 2012 02:18 pm (UTC)
awww~ thank you so much for reading! did you enjoy?

yes. I'll write more KyuHae fics. please wait for 'em. :)
kyuwifeykyuwifey on May 21st, 2012 04:47 pm (UTC)
cant wait for that...
yea i really enjoy it...
keep on trying ya ^^
(Deleted comment)
Carol: Donghae wuvv~k19a2i8m1 on May 21st, 2012 02:21 pm (UTC)
I'll try writing more. thank you so much for reading! did you enjoy, by any chance? ah.. this might be (or really is) unrelated to this but I just can't seem to write well nowadays no matter how much effort I put in. so your comment really means a lot to me right now. thank you. ;A;
Tiffany SuperJr Huntzombiesuju2012 on May 24th, 2012 01:42 am (UTC)
i loved it!!
Carol: Donghae wuvv~k19a2i8m1 on May 24th, 2012 04:02 am (UTC)
omg. thank you! ;A;

thank you so much for reading~^^
to_lovekyu: pic#117343700to_lovekyu on May 31st, 2012 11:44 am (UTC)
Kyu... it's so sad what happened to Kyu and the girl. the girl sounds pretty nice too and really selfless. but you know? i think she's really selfish deep inside. it's like, she's only like that because she doesn't want Kyu to worry but at the same time, she's like that because she knows Kyu would still worry. oh the mind games that your fics give me! @___@

Donghae is so cute though. and very sweet. for a minute there i thought he was jealous of the girl. it kinda seems like it :O
Mackenzie: pic#117343260kyuhyunownsme on June 5th, 2012 03:42 am (UTC)
i admire the girl here. Kyu should trust her more though and Donghae is awesome for being like that. i have no words. it's too beautiful.
(Deleted comment)
Carol: Donghae wuvv~k19a2i8m1 on June 10th, 2012 11:38 am (UTC)
Uh.. I don't have an account at asianfanfics. D: OMO! Can you send me the link of this piece from that site? I need to check it out!

thank you so much for reading this dongsaeng and for letting me know that someone might be taking credits for my work! ;A;